Amusement Parks And the Leisure Gap

Amusement Parks and the Leisure Gap

UP FRONT

MARK HOYER

I’M STILL TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW “normal” people tolerate “normal” vacations, amusements and general leisure time. I’ve taken to calling it the Leisure Gap.

This thought has crossed my mind from time to time over the years. Mostly at moments like when I got back from a three-day cruise to Mexico from Los Angeles many, many years ago. I felt like I'd been locked in a hotel the entire time, even with the stop in Ensenada. There were activities on board, but none of it was "real." You end up eating five meals a day and trying seven different tequilas. And I don't need a giant boat for that.

It's not that I don't want to go to a lot of the same places that other people do, but why not either get to your destination on a motorcycle or, even better, just do the whole trip on two wheels and take in entire regions at a time?

I've been fortunate to travel in Europe on extended trips several times, with the greatest concentration of miles in the Alps. For sure, I've endured foul weather and long, tiring days in the saddle, but every time I passed a tour bus on another road of a lifetime full of smells and sights getting better every mile, I'd glance up at the pas sengers and think, "Poor bastards..." even as I struggled sometimes to feel my frozen fingers.

It appeared we visited all the same historic sites and landmarks (judging by the number of buses in the parking lots), but we riders were infinitely cooler at these destinations by being dressed in leather. And we got to visit more places and see more things, not to mention choose our arrival and denarture times.

I've done the same thing in the States countless times, riding ancient Velocettes to modern six-cylinder BMWs. And there is more to be done.

The most recent reminder of the Leisure Gap was my trip to Abu Dhabi for the 1199 Panigale S launch (p. 36).

First off, I was just glad to be able to go. Running CW demands way too much desk riding, and time out of the office seems to be demanded exponentially upon my return. but I was pretty sure I needed to experience this important new motorcycle, and I have the benefit of being able to assign it to myself, so to speak. As my dad used to say. rank has its nrivile~es!

Still, I respect my wife's opinion and judgment, so I asked Jen if she thought I ought to go do it. And, like the great wife that she is, she just looked at me like worms were crawling out of my eyes, horrified that I'd even consider not going. Perfect! The right answer without even needing to sneak.

So, I signed up for what is more than likely my once-in-a-lifetime trip to the United Arab Emirates and chance to ride on the Yas Marina Formula-i circuit. No, not a vacation, but the perfect type of amusement for me. And I'd do it for a vacation any time, just like you would.

But, to the point: Ducati did us a nicety by bringing the U.S. journalists in a day early so we could (try to) get a good night's sleep and have a full day to get our heads on straight before attacking the track, which was relatively complicated, very long and did not offer a whole lot of runoff. Yes, after 28 hours of travel door to door, I was glad to have the otrnortunity to clear my head a bit.

Entertainment on our rest day was a field trip to Ferrari World, a giant amusement/theme park on Yas Island near the circuit. Ten bucks if you can guess the theme.

There we were inside this huge facility ("world's largest indoor theme park") dedicated to all things Ferrari but pretty entertaining for anybody who likes machinery (and food). It was a bit of a shame to be inside because the weather was fantastic, but there are frequent sandstorms in that region and our February trip was a long time away from the scorching days of summer in the Middle East.

There is a display of very cool cars (classic to modern, many privately owned), kids' attractions that allow them to drive their own little Ferraris, water rides (like "Small World" at Disney but through a V-12 engine) and some pretty fun, dynamic driving simulators (on hydraulic platforms!) featuring the Yas Marina circuit. Some of it is very tame, some of it educational (in a marketing more than a technical sense~ and there are several thrill rides.

The star attraction among the latter was the Formula Rosso rollercoaster. The coaster car is, naturally, shaped to resemble a Formula-i Ferrari (in red), and you might think it would be pretty lame except that this thing launches with a 20,800-hp hydraulic pressure accumulator (think steam catapult for aircraft-carrier fighter launch), firing you out of the hole and up to iSO mph in 4.9 seconds. It zero-to-60s in 2 flat, a feeling I've only ever experienced the day I got my NHRA Pro Drag Racing license on an air-shifting, wheelie-bar-equipped Harley-Davidson V-Rod Destroyer.

I have to admit I had a pretty big grin when the rollercoaster launched, because the near-5g load and eyeballforce-feed of the scenery is pretty hard to be bummed about. But, like most of what happens during "normal" leisure activities, you're passive. Things are just happening to you. So, the 90 seconds from the whacking launch and all the g loads from the dips and turns had its appeal, but there was no skill required, no en~a~ement of the brain.

That's the main reason the smile is always bigger when I am wearing a helmet. Still, Ferrari World is the best actual amusement park I recall visiting, at least as a semi-adult. It's hard to compete with going to Disneyland when I was a kid, before I understood how cool it is to steer your destiny.

Maybe there needs to be a Ducati World at some point, but after I had that thought, I realized motorcycles have awesome performance and are far more affordable than Ferraris, so Ducati World is actually right there for you, out on the road and track. Actually, let's just call the amusement park Cycle World. The ride leaves from your garage.