Sweet Scooters

Sweet SCOOTERS

CONFESSIONS OF A WANDERING WIMP

JASON SCHNEIDER

IF YOU LIKE THEM, chances are you don't tell anyone. And it's hard to blame you. But let me be an example. I'll come out of the closet, or perhaps

more accurately, wheel out of the garage. It’s time to reveal my passion for the red-headed stepchildren of the two-wheel family: scooters.

I know. I know. Admit that to a “real” motorcyclist, and you’ll probably get, at best, a condescending smirk or snide aside. If you actually ride a scooter in public, even normally tolerant types will turn on you with a “What’s that pregnant rollerskate gonna be when it grows up? You must really be a wimp/nerd/weirdo to ride that ugly/ pathetic/effeminate thing!”

So before I confront such sarcasm for my scooter-philia, let me establish my credentials as a hands-on-the-grips, shiny-side-up, comer-craving, shift-crazy “real” motorcyclist. Over the years, I’ve owned everything from a 50cc Kreidler Florett, to a brace of Velocettes, to a succession of classic Ducati V-Twins (including a beautiful black-and-gold 900SS). My collection has numbered as high as 25 machines, although I’ve pared it down to a measly 12. But don’t look for my BMW K100RS, Harley 883 Sportster or Kawasaki ZX-7R in the premier position in the garage.

That is saved for (you guessed it) three top-of-the-line scooters.

Granted, the funny-looking, plasticencased, single-cylinder contraptions may seem to have all the pizzazz of an oversized kitchen appliance, but scooters must be doing something right because they’ve been around so long.

We have the Italians to thank for that. Both the Vespa and the Lambretta were post-World War II answers to the question, “What can all our newly unemployed aircraft engineers do to get this poor, transportation-starved country on track?” The result was the first modern motorscooters, which in their own practical way were engineering masterpieces that have defined the breed ever since.

Take the Vespa. It has tubeless monocoque construction, direct gear drive to the rear wheel and a fan-cooled, two-stroke engine with rotary valve induction. To save space, the engine-transmission unit is integral with the swingarm and mounted on the right. That weight is balanced by fixing a spare tire complete with wheel on the left and covering both engine and tire compartments with beautiful if bulgy body panels that resemble the tail of a wasp (vespa in Italian.) Oh yeah, the front suspension is a single-sided trailing link that resembles (what else?) old aircraft landing gear.

Not only did the Italians create this machine way back in 1947, but they were so successful that the Vespa (along with the Model T Ford and VW Bug) is one of the top-selling motor vehicles of all time.

That certainly didn’t go unnoticed by other manufacturers, and by the late 1950s, wellengineered German machines like the Maicoletta and Heinkel Tourist, and spiffy little British scooters such as the Triumph Tina competed in an increasingly sophisticated basic-transportation market. Most of these models bit the dust, however, when motorcycle and scooter sales took a tumble in the ’60s. Only two major marques were left: Vespa and Lambretta.

Until, that is, the Japanese decided to get in on the action. Their first major contribution, the early-’60s Rabbit Superflow, had two important features shared by today’s best scooters: electric start and CVT, or constant variable transmission, that ingeniously simple and reliable form of belt-drive automatic transmission that’s found on snowmobiles and a few cars. Although the Rabbit never hit it big, these ground-breaking innovations helped set the foundation for what, in my arrogant opinion, are the world’s three greatest scooters-rides that can actually be appreciated by diehard motorcyclists because they’re really (really!)

motorcycles with small wheels.

The trio that merits such effusive praise? The Yamaha Riva 200, Honda Elite 250 and Honda Helix. All have plastic body panels, single-cylinder, four-stroke, sohc engines integral with the rear swingarm, electronic ignition, CVT transmission, dual-trailing-link front end and tubular steel frame. Despite these similarities, each displays a distinct personality.

The Riva 200 has a fan-cooled engine, mounted nearly horizontally for better weight distribution, and a hydraulic valve lifter (just like a Harley). The beauty of this baby is that it’s very low maintenance. I’ve flogged mine unmercifully for over 15,000 miles and so far only replaced a drive belt and a rear tire. It’s my daily commuter bike (70 miles round trip) and is faster (cruising at 70 mph), better handling and gets better gas mileage (65-70 mpg) than any Vespa, Lambretta or Heinkel I’ve ever ridden. It’s cheap, too. Yamaha has discontinued the Riva, but with a little perseverance you can still find new ones for under $2000. Gripes? Its ride over rough pavement is somewhat harsh and you have to remove a sidepanel to check the oil.

If the Yamaha Riva 200 is a great all-rounder, the Honda Elite 250 surely qualifies as the Ninja of motorscooters. This thing handles far better than any scooter has a right to, particularly around comers. It has a liquid-cooled, 250cc motor with a simple external valve-adjustment system, and recent models are a bit faster than the old ones (75 mph on the level). All in all, a superb scooter-if not as easy to work on as the Riva. (It, too, has been discontinued, but used ones are a dime a dozen.)

Then there is the Honda Helix, the Aspencade of scooters, a spacey-looking two-wheeled juggernaut with an over-64-inch wheelbase, 12-inch front wheel (10 at the rear), digital instruments and a built-in rear trunk that would be more useful if it held more and were better shaped. The Helix, which probably qualifies as the world’s first series-production feetforward cycle, is supremely smooth and comfortable, and very stable, even on the highway. Mine is a classic 1986 (first year of production) but the ’94 model has basically the same profile.

A few summers ago, I installed my 14-year-old son on my Helix’s comfy back seat and headed from upper New York state to Myrtle Beach,

South Carolina, without a qualm, cruising at 70-75 mph and touching 82 downhill with a slight tailwind. Although we passed through moderate showers, weather protection was excellent-better than on an average faired motorcycle.

We certainly created a spectacle, receiving enthusiastic waves even from Harley riders and Mercedes drivers, actually made friends with a few startled cops who were more interested in gawking at the strange machine than in writing well-deserved speeding tickets.

All this, with an exciting and comfortable ride besides. In short, we had big-time fun.

And that’s what taking to two wheels-big or small-is all about, isn’t it? □

Jason Schneider, Editor-inChief of Popular Photography, has been an avid motorcyclist for the past 35 years.